Wednesday, 27 February 2013

Dark Blogging

I was interviewed for a radio talk-show the other day, where we discussed blogging, writing and social media interaction. I have no idea how I sounded because it won't be broadcast until mid March but I'm sure at times I sounded a bit muppetty. I was asked a lot about my life as a blogger and why I chose to start blogging in the first place. That was the easy bit; I told him about the incredible support I have received over the years through being a part of different blogging communities and I got carried away when I described the friends I've made.

The interview took place on Monday. I'm glad really because if it had taken place yesterday I fear I would have painted blogging communities in a slightly darker light. Do I blog about this, I thought, or do I brush it under the carpet and move on? I think back to that interview and remember what I told Dominic, how vibrant a colour I painted of our blogging communities. If I were to blog about being let down, deeply upset and visibly shaken by something that happened, surely that would lower the tone of my blog? Or would it bring in the comments, would it provoke a reaction and cause that big old wooden spoon to wade through treacle as I cackled over the cauldron in which it stood?

I hope what happened never happens again but it's left me with a bad taste in my mouth; it's left me unable to trust, and that is something that worries me. I like to trust people. But of course the reality of life is not being able to trust every one, but being able to move on. I hope I can do that because there are too many people in the blogging communities of which I am a part, whom I respect, admire and am deeply fond of.

34 comments:

  1. You've always been such a support to other bloggers and writers and I'm glad to call you a friend. No idea what's happened, but sending you a big cuddle.

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    1. You don't wanna know what happened, Rachael, believe me, it's pretty ugly. And I'm honoured to call you a friend x

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  2. I don't know what's happened but sending you *hugs* Sadly it is hard to know who to trust in any situation

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  3. There is a dark side to blogging and it's horrible when we cross it, I've wanted to delete my blog & twitter account over the last month because of things I've read, but then I remember why I like to blog & the Twitter followers that are worth it!
    Carry on because I for one love reading your blog!

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    1. Thanks, Ellen. I have no intention of stopping blogging at all. I just wish people weren't so cruel. But they won't stop me blogging.

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  4. I guess, just as in life, there are mainly good but also bad people out in the blogosphere. Some people seem to get their kicks by being horrible to their fellow men/women. It is hard to know whom to trust, but I just hope those I encounter are basically good. So sorry you have had a bad experience, but hope it's just a one-off.

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    1. I've probably had tons of bad experiences in my blogging life haven't I?!! I imagine this is a one off, though I imagine it will someone else who falls foul next time, which is obviously not a nice thought.

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    2. Thing is, even those few people with the wooden spoon aren't usually bad people. For whatever reason they feel the need to draw attention to themselves and denigrate others. Crystal is right - life (and blogging, just like everything else in life) can be tough, but those who are strongest can learn and move on. I have no doubt she can do that :)

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  5. The problem with blogging forums and groups is that they encompass a variety of people whom in real life you might have never encountered. Some are great in all aspects, some are not so. There are always those whom you would probably never shaken a hand with in real life, whose tastes, principles and morals seem to be everything you are against, but you have to endure them for the sake of the peace in the group. I would never think of you as cackling over the cauldron with a wooden spoon, so if you feel like pouring your sadness into a blog post, by all means do.

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    1. I definitely agree with you. I prefer to keep the peace, I'm a wuss and don't like confrontation at all but sometimes it all gets too much.

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  6. Such a shame that this happened. As Galina said above, unfortunately the whole of life is peppered with horrible people who sour it for everyone else. Some of the stuff that goes on, beggars belief. There are also some wonderful people and a fabulous side to blogging which I will focus on from here on in. Looking forward to staying in touch via fb and twitter and of course, the blog :)

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    1. Same here, focusing on the good stuff and the good people from now on.

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  7. dang...sorry for whatever happened...does not sound great at all..i would say i have found the blog community as a whole uplifting....there have def been a few over the years though that have left a sour taste in my mouth...ironically i had a negative experience on monday...

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    1. Me too Brian. This is why when something happens to upset the balance, it upsets me personally. I need a thicker skin!

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  8. I have no idea what I missed. I think I'm glad I missed it. Hugs to you for the stress though.

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    1. A hug was needed after the few days I've had, thanks for that!

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  9. I was given this advise after Mum died in December: Hold your head up, drop your shoulders, breathe deep and walk on.
    I use it every single day. Some people can be cruel, jealous and downright nasty but they are the minority. The rest are grateful, kind and supportive. Focus on your world around you. From me- Thank you X

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    1. You're right, we are fortunate that the majority are good and we shouldn't let the minority spoil that environment.

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  10. I am sorry that you have had a bad experience, really sorry. For what it is worth, I really enjoy your blog. xx

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    1. That's lovely of you to say. I'm not giving up on the blog.

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  11. Mom Kim here - First off – congratulations on the interview. Yes, there are some really good rewards in blogging and unfortunately, there is also not so good in fact downright nasty.
    Then, I wanted to check out your post yesterday so I could find out what the bad was (it seems like it is getting more and more difficult for me sometimes to get around to reading any blogs). Someone telling me that God took something from me or gave me something – a really big pet peeve of mine and I could probably write a lengthy dissertation on it. Sometimes life is just not fair – let’s get real – life sucks sometime (I hope you don’t mind me saying that). I don’t believe God made me healthy until age 19 and then “gave” me multiple disabilities; I don’t believe God took away my mom at the age of 60 with cancer or my dad at 79 after a brief battle with cancer and God didn’t give me melanoma a few years ago. Life happens and sometimes, it’s a b!}ch. I have always believed that God really wants us to do the best we can with what we have – life deals the crap – I do believe that God is there to help us deal with it. I have always believed God is good and great and a benevolent God. And those are MY beliefs – I’m not gonna tell anyone what is unless I know something is 110% fact. And nobody has ever proven to me, without a doubt, what God can or cannot give or take away.

    You jusr keep on blogging and keep on hittine the delete when you read a comment that just plain hurts too much - this is YOUR blog and you can do/say what you will and if others don't like it then that is THEIR problem. The unfortunate part is you have to see the rude comments. Hugs to you for reading my rant.
    Mom Kim

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    1. Thank you for your very detailed comment, it's much appreciated.

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  12. Muppetty is a great word - and I'm sure you weren't! Sorry about the other stuff.

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  13. e veryone has said it all! Hugs to you x

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  14. Rise above them, ignore the bastards and carry on! hugs x

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  15. Well whatever happened put it behind you and concentrate on the good blogging/bloggers, the others are not worth even thinking about honey. xx

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  16. Well whatever happened, don't let it put you off. There are good and bad everywhere and you have plenty of good comments and we all enjoy your blog.
    Could it be a touch of jealousy?
    Maggie x

    Nuts in May

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    1. I wouldn't like to say, really I wouldn't. I have no idea what goes through people's minds sometimes but it hasn't been a pleasant few days so far as being involved with groups on Facebook is concerned. However, onwards and hopefully upwards.

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  17. Thank God I left the group before this happened. Not sure what happened but don't like to think of you hurt xxx

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  18. I have found the blogging community to be incredibly supportive overall, however, I have found myself in certain groups and tend to quickly dip out as they all tend to implode after awhile. They seem to have a short shelf life. As you and I know there are amazing people out there it just takes a while to work it out. I have some amazing blogging friends and I count you as one of them. I'm clueless on what happened and I quite like it that way!

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  19. By and large, the parent blogging community is supportive and friendly; we only need to see how we've reacted to Kerry's illness and subsequent death, and poor little Matilda's death, to know that we can be very supportive. However, I am increasingly shocked with the way that a minority in this community are determined to dictate how people must blog. As Galina says, they're not people that I would mix with in real life and therefore I don't particularly want to now. Your blog has always been one that I really admire, please keep ignoring them.

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  20. I'm sorry that people have made you feel like that Kathryn,I love your stuff and am glad that you are not going to let anyone put you off.Carry on the good work :-)

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