Saturday, 14 April 2012

Womenfolk of the 21st Century

There are times I feel I've been whisked back into the 1950's since living here. I've noticed over the years how men in particular (sometimes the women, too) can't look a woman in the eyes, can't have an adult conversation and won't take instructions from a woman. The amount of times I've answered the door to workmen (and other men) asking, "is he in?" and "is the boss man about?" and "I can't see him anywhere (looking around frantically as though they're terrified of speaking to a woman), shall I come back?" Do men realise how annoying this is? Do they not understand that in this day and age, women do possess some skills and are capable of having a conversation without talking about kids, washing and what to have for tea? I was particularly irritated the other day when two workmen showed up at the house. They came in separate cars. As we have sheep and lambs on the garden it's important we keep the drive gate closed at all times. But these workmen left it wide open. It's usually open when there are no sheep about, and as they've been before it was quite obvious that it was closed for a reason. I was just about to get in the shower when they arrived, the dogs barking furiously alerted me to their arrival. I peeped out of the window and assumed The Farmer would be around so I carried on and got in the shower. Unfortunately, The Farmer wasn't around and the next thing I knew there was a ladder being fixed against the outside of the house. Without further ado, I got out of the shower, dressed and went downstairs. Flung open the back door in temper and realised it was the two men who had been coming to do some maintenance on the outside of our house since the horrendous winter of 2010. It's now spring 2012.

They've been a few times in between, looked up at the damage, rubbed their chin, mumbled a few words about ladders, then gone away.

We've chased them up several times and I've had words with The Farmer about why we have to use them, but he insists. Life on the farm is never dull, but it is a little bit too laid back sometimes when things clearly need to be done. So when I went outside and almost bit one of their heads off (the other one was hiding behind the wall), it was quite obvious they didn't want to talk to me. After all, I'm a woman, what the fuck do I know about gutters and drain pipes? Actually not a lot, but that's not the point. I stomped off and summoned The Farmer from the shed who calmly greeted the workmen as if he was grateful they'd turned up. I give up. I really do.

Though I'm not a feminist, it does rattle my cage when I'm made to feel like I don't know nowt. Even if I don't.


28 comments:

  1. I don't understand why you would worry your sweet little head about such things, look fluffy lamb and pink pretty things over there! It would work. The pink fluffy approach if you weren't expected to put on a boiler suit and get in the shed helping. They can't have it all ways. Talking to women as if they are incapable but expecting us to open our own doors and actually break nails. I feel your pain.

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    1. I have a pink fluffy dressing gown; I shall wear it when they come back next week. It might stop them being so scared of me.

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    2. I personally think you should step out of the shower and fling the door open to them without bothering with the dressing gown!

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    3. Em, might try that one day. It'd soon see them off!

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  2. Oh yes! Round here the term for women is "Mate" it makes me laugh (in an ironical way!) I mean - do I look like a bloke? As for the incident you shared - can empathise quite easily, infact now when faced with a cold call asking for information I reply"You need to speak to my husband he deals with such matters" saves so much time. Even if it is a call about the betterware catalogue I say the same. lol!

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    1. I'd do that gladly but the Farmer is hopeless on the phone. He's too polite to cold callers!

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  3. It looks absolutely beautiful where you live. Too bad you're not given the credit to answer questions about your own home (I use to get that when I would take my car into the shop.)

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    1. Oh yes, mechanics are the same - we women know nothing about cars do we, and the ones who do are seen as odd!

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  4. I had the opposite this week when the electricians came to fix two light fittings: hubby greeted them, showed them the problem, let them fix them, but then they wouldn't leave until they knew I was happy with the job! Even the invoice they sent stated "Mrs W M was happy"!! Maybe things are different in the big city! ;)

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    1. Something that 'never' happens here. Bills and correspondence are always sent to Mr, rather than Mrs. Even the car we bought last year that I signed the cheque for and filled out the form, whenever we get correspondence about it, it's addressed to the farmer!!

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  5. Or they talk to and look at a point six inches below your chin, as if that is all they really think we are there on this planet for!

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    1. I get that too. Maybe next time a workman comes here I'll look at his crotch area while I'm addressing him.

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  6. Yes, it rattles mine too.
    Another annoying thing is when the hospital rings up our home and asks for the man of the house by name & insists on giving him information that he promptly forgets. I usually have to contact them again.
    If they know that a patient is having problems with memory, then why don't they talk to their next of kin?
    Maggie X

    Nuts in May

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    1. It doesn't make sense does it? Why on earth can't they just talk to you and make the whole job so much easier?!

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  7. It depends how I'm feeling as to whether it bugs me or not to be honest! But them taking 2 years to do the work would have driven me batty!

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    1. Lol, yes, same here. Sometimes I let it go but when I was in the shower and realised I was just about to be spied on in the nuddy, I was pretty aghast!

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  8. Not living in the country ,but in a city with over 50% of single households, workmen in general are used to talking to women, and they actually do as they are told (!) but the people from the Peugeot garage drove me nuts. They took my 16 year old non driving son (at the time) more seriously than me who just bought a car off them . The Air con wasn't working and they claimed that I made a mistake using it. Turned out they hadn't checked there was cooling fluid in it. They apologised to my SON not to me when I came to collect the car! And that wasn't the only incident I had with them.

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    1. That would have infuriated me, too, Ivy. The same thing happens when we use the garages here, just for a service or MOT. They don't seem to want to converse with a woman. It's all very sexist isn't it.

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  9. There are still a few men like that hereabouts - not many thank God.....

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    1. I think I've noticed it more here in the countryside than I did when I lived in the town. But unfortunately for me, I find a lot of men are this way!

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  10. When I saw your comment on Twitter I guessed it was something similar! I'm constantly surprised by attitudes up here. The solicitor we saw the other day only discussed our house sale with my husband, pretty much ignoring me. It does my head in but I don't let it bother me any more!

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    1. Oooh, that would make me fuming. Our solicitor is a woman and quite well balanced!

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  11. At bestg it is ignorance (which cannogt be in this day and age and at worst it is downright RUDE!

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  12. next time they come ask if you can deal with their wives

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    1. I love it! I'd also love to see their faces, lol.

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  13. Do you think this is linked to you living in a more rural area? I live in the middle of Newcastle which is close geographically but don't seem to have that problem, though we do have others. Yesterday I was taking Gizzy out in the morning and, while bending down to pick up his poo a lorry of muscle heads went past hooting and making rude gestures. I mean really, how seductive can picking up dog poo be?x

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    1. I definitely do, Rachael. I used to live in the town when I lived in Manchester and have noticed the difference since moving to the countryside, 11 years ago.

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  14. What a shame, it's such a cliche isn't it? A shame that it's still that way for some people. Maybe I should have scooped the poo and sent it flying their way! Next time maybe...

    Today I’ve done a post with tips for buying fresh flowers if you’d like to take a peak.Rx

    http://sandersonsmithstory.blogspot.co.uk/

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